Year of Dwennimen

Volunteering for the #DreamProject2013 symposium. Almost go...

Thu, 28 Mar 2013 08:11:57 -0400

Volunteering for the #DreamProject2013 symposium. Almost go time!

Cheerleading days circa 2001(?) #throwbackthursday #tbt

Thu, 21 Mar 2013 18:01:02 -0400

Cheerleading days circa 2001(?) #throwbackthursday #tbt

Love this #quote! #evisays #dreams

Mon, 04 Mar 2013 14:18:13 -0500

Love this #quote! #evisays #dreams

“The richest people in the world look for & build...

Thu, 31 Jan 2013 17:22:41 -0500

“The richest people in the world look for & build networks. Everyone else looks for work.” —#robertkiyosaki #evisays

good: Airbnb’s Hurricane Sandy Plan: How We’re Helping and How...

Sat, 03 Nov 2012 14:26:41 -0400

good:

Airbnb’s Hurricane Sandy Plan: How We’re Helping and How You Can Help - by Airbnb

Hurricane Sandy has affected millions of people. But it has also provided an invitation to share our space in truly meaningful ways.

Shell, an Airbnb host in Brooklyn, is offering her five guest rooms to stranded travelers and locals—for free. She provides an example of how we can all help.

There are more than 20,000 Airbnb listings available in affected areas. Airbnb is waiving all of our fees for these spaces. We encourage our entire community to help anyone who has been left stranded or in need because of the hurricane.

The fee-free traveling and hosting applies to both guests who book and hosts who accept new bookings that start between now and November 7 in New York City, the Hamptons, Providence, New Haven, and Atlantic City. (The max trip length is seven nights.)

If you’re an existing host in an affected area and can help, please consider lowering your price. You can do this in your account settings. We have created a Discounted Sandy Listings Wish List that showcases hosts in the affected regions who are reducing prices for stranded travelers and locals.

If you are in a position to share space, please consider listing your space so others might find you.

We started Airbnb so that what’s most inspiring about people and their spaces could be shared. Thanks, Shell, for providing this inspiration for our global community.

For more information about how your can help, or to read a list of frequently asked questions, please visit our blog.

Airbnb is a global community marketplace that connects travelers seeking authentic, high-quality accommodations with hosts who offer unique places to stay.

motherjones: Why all the (single) ladies need to get out and...

Sat, 03 Nov 2012 14:24:29 -0400

motherjones:

Why all the (single) ladies need to get out and vote.

A little smokey eye with navy for tonight’s festivities....

Sat, 04 Aug 2012 20:32:49 -0400

A little smokey eye with navy for tonight’s festivities. (Taken with Instagram)

Got all teary-eyed opening the mail today: Best friend sent...

Thu, 19 Jul 2012 12:52:15 -0400

Got all teary-eyed opening the mail today: Best friend sent monogramed mug to celebrate me starting my business! Coffee please! (Taken with Instagram)

#juicing Orange, Mango, Carrot Juice via @BlendHappy. Garnish...

Thu, 12 Jul 2012 12:16:59 -0400

#juicing Orange, Mango, Carrot Juice via @BlendHappy. Garnish with mint if you’re fancy! (Taken with Instagram)

Love my new juicer! Today’s breakfast: pineapple, kale,...

Tue, 10 Jul 2012 09:18:43 -0400

Love my new juicer! Today’s breakfast: pineapple, kale, spinach, celery , cucumber and ginger. (Taken with Instagram)

Pool, view of the mountains and listening to the Beatles =...

Sun, 01 Jul 2012 16:23:11 -0400

Pool, view of the mountains and listening to the Beatles = perfect. (Taken with Instagram)

"But who can say what’s best? That’s why you need to grab whatever chance you have of happiness where..."

Mon, 25 Jun 2012 18:27:01 -0400

“But who can say what’s best? That’s why you need to grab whatever chance you have of happiness where you find it, and not worry about other people too much. My experience tells me that we get no more than two or three such chances in a life time, and if we let them go, we regret it for the rest of our lives. ”

- Haruki Murakami (via icarntspell)

Relevant.

(via somuchsass)

Quick healthy snack: low fat Greek yogurt, pistachios and a...

Mon, 18 Jun 2012 19:47:50 -0400

Quick healthy snack: low fat Greek yogurt, pistachios and a little drizzle of honey. (Taken with Instagram)

Couldn’t resist this card. Inside: “I just helped...

Sun, 17 Jun 2012 14:01:40 -0400

Couldn’t resist this card. Inside: “I just helped myself to whatever cash I could find in your wallet.” (Taken with Instagram)

Atlanta Corporate Fight Night (representing @NicholasHouse)...

Thu, 07 Jun 2012 21:15:39 -0400

Atlanta Corporate Fight Night (representing @NicholasHouse) (Taken with Instagram)

My blog post for #GreaterThanAIDS is on Ebony.com. Super...

Wed, 06 Jun 2012 14:18:42 -0400

My blog post for #GreaterThanAIDS is on Ebony.com. Super enthusiastic thumbs up!! http://www.ebony.com/wellness-empowerment/update-your-status-why-testing-matters (Taken with instagram)

Today I Begin

Fri, 25 May 2012 17:09:00 -0400

“Genuine beginnings begin within us, even when they are brought to our attention by external opportunities.” —William Bridges

I started this blog and titled it “Year of Dwennimen” because I had just gone through a very tough year with regard to relationships and dealing with “adult” things. I decided to break up with a man that I thought I was going to marry. Someone who I had spent 5 years of my life with, who had been a friend 4 years prior to the start of us being together. He had caused so much pain because of his own internal struggles with love and who was their for him and his inability to hold himself accountable for the things going on his life. I had to let go of a 7 year friendship that was never what I thought it was, and was also manipulative and conditional as my 5-year romantic relationship had been. Then, my closest friend of 4 years dropped off the face of the earth and removed me from her life accordingly, without a word of why when I hadn’t done anything at all but be a friend (we’re close again now, and it turned out to be a situation where she went inward for a few months and didn’t know how to communicate it at the time).

My support network was unraveling fast before my eyes. I was also navigating a very trying job where I felt like I was encouraged to be good but not *too* good. I was also taking on three positions that had been not-so-neatly combined into one position, and was expected to continue working miracles as the organization got itself through the storm.

I was 23 going through a lot of big-girl things all at once.

For the first time in a long time I asked myself “What do I need and what is good for me?” I didn’t realize it then, but the Universe had sent an angel (now my fiance) well before all of these things occurred. If he hadn’t been there, I’m sure I would have gone a little nuts first before dealing with everything.

He helped me stand in my own shoes. One by one I began setting boundaries for the first time, with each significant person in my life that was draining me and not even thinking about what was good for me. I felt good about each decision I made to eliminate someone from my life or distance myself when necessary because before I met him, I couldn’t tell anyone what I really wanted or what I needed. That’s no where near the person I am. But things had gotten that way.

The tireless nonprofit worker, care giver, girl who always took care of everyone and everything else—I was the poster child for all of those things. I still take care of things and people, but I know in practice now that you can’t help anyone else if you’ve neglected yourself.

It was a hard time, but I got through it. My heart hurt having broken up with someone I cared so deeply for, but we weren’t supposed to be together. Everyone is in our lives for a reason, season or lifetime and now I’m fine with letting go if that’s the way things need to be.

That summer after my birthday I got a tattoo. It’s the “Dwennimen” symbol, which means “Ram’s Horns” and stands for “Strength with humility and wisdom”. It’s an Adinkra symbol which represents my Ghanaian heritage (I’m first generation, and half African and half American), and it represents the most important characteristic you can have in your time here on Earth. It reminds me that all of the awful, stressful and frustrating situations I have gone through and will experience in the future are necessary for my journey. I’m also reminded of how to proceed in each situation.

Today, 3 years later:
1. I’m about to marry the man of my dreams
2. I have such an amazing support network of really great friends and family
3. I’ve resigned from my toxic job
4. I’m starting my own business
5. I’m helping others with everything I do
6. I’ve started writing again (750words.com)

All of these things are awesome. I’m nervous, excited, scared and thrilled all at once, but I know that everything is going to be just fine.

The quote on beginnings and writing this right now is so important because I’m having another “Dwennimen” moment.

My wedding is in 3 months. My sister, who’s removed herself from my bridal party and wedding altogether, is going through serious issues (maybe clinical depression?) and my youngest niece is aggravating the situation and doing normal teenage-acting-out type things. I have been through more drama in the past 3 and a half weeks than I’d like. It’s looking more and more like my niece needs to be removed from the situation temporarily and my family is going to have to be firm about my sister getting the help she needs. Not only have I been having to deal with stuff from my sister, I’ve also had to deal with my mom being in denial and defensive of my sister instead of dealing with the issues we have at hand. (Let’s not even talk about the fact that I feel guilty sharing this publicly because of the stigma of depression in general and in the black community specifically. But not only is psychology my background, the stigma is something that can only be changed through people talking about it and sharing. Who knows who could read this and feel more comfortable about speaking up or getting help.)

I’ve had to be the adult and the problem solver and focus on the well-being of both my sister and niece and it hasn’t been fun. Luckily, I have my father and brother and other family members who are supportive and happy to give advice or help. I also am so thankful for my fiance, and for all of my friends who have given their support in the past month. This is the last thing I thought I’d have to deal with 3 months before my wedding, but nothing happens exactly as we plan it.

I truly believe that everything happens not just for a reason, but also right on time.

In this Dwennimen moment I also remind myself that I’ve been through much worse. The knowledge I’ve gained from the past is helping me with setting my boundaries and making sure that I help in a way that doesn’t consume. With all that I’ve been through in the past month I’ve learned my strengths, my role and what’s necessary for all of this to turn out right.

Everything doesn’t have to be perfect or all set. I trust my intuition. I trust in the decisions I make and where my heart is. I’m just going to put one foot in front of the other and go day by day.

Today, I begin.

good: Debates over access to abortion and birth control seemed...

Wed, 18 Apr 2012 11:32:04 -0400

good:

Debates over access to abortion and birth control seemed to dominate the national conversation throughout the Republican primary, but according to a new Pew poll, those issues aren’t a major priority for most voters. For 86 percent of them, it’s still the economy, stupid.

750 Words.com: One of the best things I've found in 2012 so far.

Mon, 09 Apr 2012 22:17:31 -0400

750 Words.com: One of the best things I've found in 2012 so far.:

This is where the (writing) magic happens.

Chris Guillebeau's "The Tower": A Free Report for a New Way of Life

Thu, 29 Mar 2012 10:33:52 -0400

Chris Guillebeau's "The Tower": A Free Report for a New Way of Life:

On creating your legacy and living your life your way.

I am so glad I took the time to read this. It is so worth it. Only 23 pages—you’ve got time.